Among the many twists and turns of last year was the cancelling of many plans and a few awesome trips. Greece, to be exact. My husband and I were heading to Greece to study Paul, eat amazing food, and see breathtaking sights. Instead, we were living at the hospital while our son battled for his life. We were separated from our children, friends, family, and what felt like the rest of planet earth. We made it back home for the holidays, so I was content with the closing of a totally stupid year. Needless to say, I had high hopes for the new year, and it was going to deliver big time. Wrong! Or was I?
Our son's progress was not as expected. Shocker. He has been slow to heal. He had a lot of trouble the beginning of this year. The doctors tested him for lymphoma as well as antibodies that could be fighting the success of transplant. The days were long and the months were hard. However, hearing the good news that it was neither cancer ,nor killer antibodies, was relieving. He wasn't where he should be, but he was stable. Stable enough to be let off of our year long quarantine we had been on. April was on its way and we could sense freedom coming. Then COVID hit. What the heck. I refused to be rattled. I refused to start hoarding. (Honestly, how much could a family of 8 stock up on without moving people out of the house? My weekly grocery haul makes me look like a hoarder on any given week anyways.) I refused to allow fear to strip away anymore than it had already claimed the year before. And I refused to let some virus destroy the progress we had made. So back we went into quarantine with a limited supply of toilet paper.
I think we can all agree that it's been quite a year. Maybe some of you have had to cancel trips, cancel events, cancel graduations, or have found yourself in situations you would have never chosen. Maybe you are in a rocky season, or a season of hurt or loss. For that, I am sorry. I have been there. Maybe not in your exact circumstances, but I know what hurt and loss feel like. I know what it feels like to not be able to catch your breath, or to feel as though every time you make progress something else seems to pull you back down. It seems impossible and unfair. Everything you had worked towards, everything you had hoped for, everything you had expected, shattered. Gone. For many, that is what 2020 has brought, shattered expectations. But what lies amongst the broken pieces?
It seems unlikely to find anything but a heap of crap in the present. Our country has dealt with many upsets this year. People have dealt with so many upsets. People have lost jobs, lost businesses, and lost loved ones. We have cried, yelled, raged, mourned, and have battled fear and depression. Hopefully though, there have been moments of laughter and signs of life that have kept us afloat. Hopefully you have still been able to find joy and hope even in the hardest of times. There are still things to be celebrated. You just might have to dig through the rubble to find them.
Our son has turned a corner just in the last month. We are seeing positive gains that we thought we would never see. We have continued to wake up each day with air in our lungs and purpose for our lives. Even if we don't feel like it, we do. And so do you. God wasn't surprised by my son's diseases, or his progress, or by Covid, or anything that you might be facing right now. His expectations are never shattered. He is never taken off guard. He is constantly moving and working things for good. He is faithful, and we have seen that more than ever in the last two years. Good has, and will continue to come from 2020. We just might have to search to see it.
I will leave you with this, it is one of my absolute favorite verses. It is found in John 16:33. Jesus is talking to his disciples about his time on earth coming to an end. He explains to the disciples that though he will be leaving them, they will go on to do great things and will see him again. He states that their grief will turn to joy. When He's finished, He leaves them with this verse, "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."
We all have had shattered expectations, but take heart my dear friends. He has overcome. He has overcome sorrow, loss, devastation, disease, addiction, sin, failure, and so much more. He has overcome the world.
Until next time, Beautiful...
