The Sun Will Shine Again

Dear Future Self,

     I am writing this letter to you as a reminder. Life hasn't always been easy, and we both know it hasn't always adhered to "the plan." It has, however, gone according to His plan. This is just another one of those seasons.
     We started planning 2019 back in 2018. We had almost the entire year planned out. We had trips planned to visit a bird sanctuary and coffee plantation in Colombia, South America, the beautiful Gulf Coast beaches in Florida, and the Footsteps of Paul in Greece. We were excited, and ready to take on 2019. What we didn't remember in all of the planning is that life happens. We didn't make our bird and coffee date, nor did we get to feel the sand between our toes. We also had to cancel our excursion to Greece. The famous phrase, "Change of Plans," seemed to govern 2019.
     In March, we decided to host a sibling group of orphaned children as well as another young lady, all from Eastern Europe, for the month of July. A few weeks before they were to arrive, the young lady received news that parental rights had been terminated. What deflating news for that poor girl. The glimmer of hope she had to be reunited with her mom had been put out. She wasn't coming back for her. She also wasn't going to be coming to America. Change of plans...
     April came, and we said goodbye to one of the greatest guys we've ever met. Cancer had paid a visit, and didn't want to leave. Five months prior, we said goodbye to his beautiful bride. Both farewells were quick and definitely not expected so soon. Change of plans...
     The day after we celebrated the life of our dear friend, our son started to get sick. He got very sleepy, lost his appetite, and turned yellow. We gave it the weekend, but no improvement. Monday came, and we went to see his pediatrician. The next morning we were called with his lab results, and told to head to Duke Children's Hospital immediately. After a stay in the hospital and many many tests, we made it through the month of May. He was diagnosed with Immune Mediated Liver Disease. What is this you ask? We don't really know. No one really does. It is a newly identified disease. We know that the liver has its own immune defense system and that it got all fired up. We also know that it has the potential to trigger other diseases and problems, but don't really know how or when. Change of plans...
     It's June. A few weeks in, and we have seen our son go from very sick and very yellow back to his feisty little self. His liver has calmed down, and his levels are returning to normal. Words can't describe what it feels like as a parent to see your son recover from a sickness that's attacked his little body like that. Our lab visits got spread out a little farther, and so did the doctors visits. We could start to see the end in sight. So we thought. Change of plans...
     Last weekend we noticed a slight dip in our son's health. Nothing too serious, but we called the doctor, and labs were bumped up. We received his results, and his liver numbers look beautiful. However, there is a hiccup in his blood count. Since the beginning of his illness his white blood cells have slightly dipped. That can happen when the liver gets inflamed, but now that his numbers are back to normal his blood counts should be also. They continue to drop, along with his platelet count. We have an appointment with the hematologist next week. Whatever was attacking the liver may have moved on to his blood system. We aren't sure. It may be something different altogether. Whatever it is, it's unknown at this point.
     After that news, I had to get out of the house, so I went out on the deck. The whole family joined me. They decided to grab the water balloons, and have some fun. It was great. It was cloudy because a storm was rolling in. I looked at my son. I realized how fragile my dreams are. My dreams about the future, about our present, all had been shaken in that one moment. I looked at him with the realization he might not be here forever. I looked at our other five, and realized none of us are promised tomorrow. Things happen, life happens, and plans change. The one thing that doesn't change is God. He is unshakable. He is unmovable and never-changing. He loves me more than I can comprehend. I know that. What He has shown me through all of this, is that He loves my son like that also. He loves my son more than I do, and that has blown my mind while at the same time given me immeasurable peace.
     Back to that storm...The wind was blowing pretty fiercely, and we were standing on the deck waiting for the rain and the thunder to ruin our family fun. The air was chilled, and we were all about to go in, when it happened. The clouds broke, and there was the sun. It was warm and seemed brighter than it had been in a long time. Every one of us stopped what we were doing to celebrate it. We looked up right at it and soaked it in. It lasted until it was time to go in for dinner. Whatever is going on, whatever storm we are in, or we are bracing ourselves for, God has a way of reminding me that the sun WILL shine again. It always has. (And it always will.)

Until Next Time, Beautiful...